You Could Easier Gather a Thousand Feathers

It was an outdoor worship service at a mountain amphitheater, and despite a strong wind, everyone was glad to be in the fresh air and sunshine. The pastor had just concluded his sermon.

"Now, one final lesson." He picked up a large canvas bag, stepped to the edge of the cliff, and untied the bag. "Watch carefully."

He turned his back to the wind and, with a quick flip of his wrists, upended the bag. Out flew hundreds of feathers, swirling every which way into the gale, sailing out over the valley and river toward the hills beyond.

The pastor turned to his congregation. "Who will volunteer to retrieve all the feathers?"

Shaking heads, incredulous laughs. Someone called out, "Who'd be crazy enough to think they could?"

"Careless words," the pastor explained, "are like those feathers. Once you let out a cruel remark or a thoughtless accusation, you lose all control over where the words go. They fly faster and farther than the wind; they pierce deep into hearts; and if they ruin someone's life or reputation, God will hold you responsible for unleashing them."

We all have times we want to tell someone exactly what we think of the whole industry he works for, to call someone a worthless idiot for spilling tea on six hours of our work, to get back for coming in second by implying that the first-place finisher did something unethical. Usually we don't really intend to harm anyone; we just want to relieve our hurt feelings and reassure ourselves that we are still the most important people alive. And we never think as we walk away, satisfied with our venting, that constant verbal abuse from others like ourselves may be tearing a service clerk apart inside, or that people have resorted to suicide to escape vicious slander that started with tiny rumors.

St. Paul knew all too well how it felt to be on the receiving end of ugly words. It's likely that when he wrote, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ" (2 Cor. 10:5), he considered the sinful talk those pretensions and thoughts would lead to if unchecked. At least one modern writer has illustrated the "take thoughts captive" concept, specifically as it applies to speech, by noting parallels to calf roping at a rodeo. Just as the object of the rodeo event is to lasso and tie down the animal before it gets from the chute to the exit gate, we need to head off all better-left-unsaid thoughts between the brain and the mouth. And just as the calf roper needs quick reaction time and fast reflexes to succeed in the contest, we need the power of the Holy Spirit, cultivated through prayer and deliberate right thoughts, to develop the internal reflexes for stopping careless talk before it starts.

If that sounds "too hard," compare it to the difficulty of picking up hundreds of feathers scattered far and wide. And ask yourself what price regret.

You could easier gather a thousand feathers,
Flung free to the wind and blown out north and south,
Than undo the effects of a word untethered,
Flung out to the world once you open your mouth.

You could easier scoop up the water's ripples,
Or hold the sea's waves in the crook of your arm,
Than call halt to the flurry of gossip's whispers
That start with snide words, though you meant no real harm.

You could easier snatch from the clouds the thunder,
Than undo the hurt that a few words can wreak.
It is better by far to avoid the blunder--
So keep thoughtless words locked inside of your cheek!

Many Words

Those who revel in the sound of their own voices are frequently left to enjoy themselves free of competition. "If you want to know how to make people shun you," notes Dale Carnegie's classic How to Win Friends and Influence People, "here is the recipe: Never listen to anyone for long. Talk incessantly about yourself. If you have an idea while the other person is talking... bust right in and interrupt." Proverbs 10:19 predicts even more serious consequences than losing all one's friends: "When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise" (NIV). (See also the blog entry for 4/21/08.)

For all that--and for all our quickness to agree that nonstop babblers are horrendous bores--"talking too much" is a near-universal fault, probably because human nature easily recognizes it in everyone but ourselves. Even in prayer, the majority of us do nearly all the talking: "We dictate to God our shopping list and say 'Amen,'" as one writer put it. Then we complain that God "doesn't answer our prayers," when in fact we aren't listening for answers--we just want God to give us what we want and then step back until we think of something else to ask for. And we seldom seem to make room for any idea that He might want--or deserve--anything from us.

If somebody said straight out, "I don't think God or anyone else is important except as a means to serve my interests," we'd be shocked at such arrogance. Yet through our other words--our incessant talking about how much we know and how important our needs are and how we never get enough respect--many of us say the same thing daily.

That's why talking too much can't be dismissed as a relatively harmless personality flaw. Considering ourselves more important than even God is the worst of sins.

To make endless talk is an easy thing--
Thousands chatter in mindless ways--
But to know when the time for silence comes
Is a skill worth the highest praise.

To write countless words is a common thing,
Seeming often to have no end;
But to read the words of God's Holy Book
Is a way few their time will spend.

Our Lord's priceless words seek our minds and hearts,
Yet so many stop up each ear.
Please, today turn from your own empty words,
And take time God's great voice to hear!

When Words Are Many, Sin Is Not Absent

When I started this blog, I intended to include only three or four sentences of prose commentary with each poem. Almost from the beginning, I have consistently fallen short--er, long--of that goal.

The tendency to ramble is almost universal--and makes for boring reading. That's why our teachers insisted we rewrite school papers before turning them in, and why published work of even the most experienced authors is nearly always shorter than the original drafts. It's an extremely rare writer who can avoid the compulsion to "tell all" when first getting words down on paper.

The problem is worse with the spoken word, which offers no chance to go back and edit. Today's title is lifted directly from the NIV translation of Proverbs 10:19, which also says that "he who holds his tongue is wise." For most of my life, I have regularly detoured from that wise path; even my family complains that I regularly "talk a subject to death." Usually out of determination to get the other person to admit I am absolutely and completely right, or a desire to show off my knowledge. The specific sin behind most people's "many words" is pride.

Pride is probably also behind the fact that, as Thomas a Kempis said, "it is easier to be silent altogether than to speak in moderation.” As with the proverbial bag of potato chips from which nobody can eat just one, letting out the few necessary words frequently unleashes an anything-but-necessary outpouring. "I'm sorry I did that, but [lengthy attempt to justify oneself]." "Thank you for what you did, but [long explanation as to why it fell short]." "I'm sorry for your loss, but [unwanted advice on how it could have been avoided]." Almost in midsentence, we forget the other's needs and start thinking about how we can come out looking good. Even in prayer, we talk too much, telling God what we want rather than determining to hear what He wants us to ask for.

It is impossible to follow the great commandments to love God and other people, if we would rather talk at others than listen to them.

If you would keep your loves and friends,
If you would please your Lord,
Know when the time for talking ends,
And watch your every word.

If you owe an apology,
Let that be all you say,
And spare the lengthy "But, you see..."
To justify your way.

If you are angry or upset,
Or if you disagree,
Still keep from stirring up regret
By tossing words too free.

Beware of telling all you know,
Explaining on and on,
For there the seeds of conflict grow,
And peace will soon be gone.

If you would love your God and Lord--
Your fellow humans, too--
Beware the thoughtless spoken word,
Where danger ever grew.

Deadly Weapons

I'm hardly the first to observe that the playground chant, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me," is only true insofar as it refers to direct physical injury. If words were completely harmless, there'd be no need for the verse! Not only does it take exceptional self-confidence to remain truly unfazed by vicious mockery or angry accusations, but words can cause real physical harm indirectly, when they damage a person's reputation or incite listeners to hatred.

It's particularly sad when those who claim to represent nonviolence fling brutal invectives at their opponents. Even Christians ignore the "hate sin but love the sinner" principle and freely label others as "perverts," "heretics," "baby killers," "corrupters of our children and nation." Perhaps we deserve it when those on the receiving end of such talk retaliate by calling us "hypocrites."

The Bible has a good deal to say about the power of words, but particularly relevant here is Peter's admonition that we should speak even to our enemies "with gentleness and respect" (1 Peter 3:15). Victory through nonviolence is the unique mark of the Christlike soul.

Sharper than the knife that slashes,
Tearing flesh and joint apart,
Is the tongue that sneers and slanders,
Cutting through a breaking heart.

Harder than the fastest bullet,
Speeding toward the point of death,
Is the insult flung in anger,
Fiery as a dragon's breath.

Stronger than a hundred lashes,
When it comes to causing pain,
Stronger than a club or hammer,
Is the jeering taunt's refrain.

You who march to end all warfare,
You, who gas and guns oppose,
Do you think to watch the weapon
That is fixed beneath your nose?